Grey Cup Poem - Regina, Sask Nov. 24, 2013

Poem written by a Regina man. 

‘Twas The Night Before Grey Cup – 2013

John McIntyre

‘Twas the night before Grey Cup and at Taylor Field,

Not a creature was stirring, the entrances sealed.

The Riders were nestled and snug in their beds,

And yes, visions of Grey Cup Rings danced in their heads.

But Scarth Street downtown was abundant with clatter,

The cold air, the late hour, did not seem to matter,

The noise woke Kent Austin, who was up in a flash,

To the Tiger-Stripe curtains, he made a mad dash.

He heard Green is the Color and then Rider Pride,

Then he growled at the crowd with his eyes open wide,

He looked down at the fans with their face paint and toys,

And he stood there on Grey Cup Eve, hating the noise.

The scene ‘neath his window, to Kent was not pleasin’

It’s quite hard to know why, no one quite knows the reason,

Some think it goes back to that night at the Dome,

When the Riders played banjos, so far from their home.

Some think, perhaps, ‘twas an ’89 spin,

When an Earl and a Champion came up short of the win,

But whatever the reason, right now, or back then,

He must stop the Riders from winning – again.

“That’s it!,” Austin beamed with a Cheshire grin,

“I know just how to keep those green guys from the win.”

He got some green face paint, melon hat, and a beard,

But with a Tiger-Cat jacket, the whole thing looked quite weird.

He looked down on the crowd with his green and white eyes,

“I need just one more thing to complete this disguise,”

So he went straight downstairs to Victoria Park,

And got an old #9 jersey from some guy named Mark.

In his Roughrider costume he moved through the crowd,

But his green melon hat made the noise much more loud,

He saw many melons on heads that he knew,

There was one on Dave Ridgway, on Glen Suitor, too.

On Elgaard, on Fairholm, on Aldag, on Duke,

There were so many melons, Kent thought he might puke,

Milt and Matty were meloned and shaking their hips,

While Shultz sat in a corner eating All-Dressler Chips.

Austin’s eye then was drawn to a big costumed Tabby,

Right beside a big gopher who danced not too shabby,

“The noise those fans make all begins with that rat,”

“With his signs and his car, with a hole and all that.”

Yes, Kent hated Gainer, the whole football season,

Again, don’t ask why, no one quite knows the reason,

But Kent’s plan was simple: no Gainer to love,

No Gopher at gametime, no noise from above.

Kent grabbed Gainer’s tie, began to lead him away,

When a high-pitched voice shouted a shrill and loud, “HEY!”

“What are you doing with Gainer, Mr. Guy?”

“Why are you taking our Gopher Friend? – Why?”

A small child wore a jersey with a big #5,

Then she screamed, “You’re Kent Austin! – Dad saw you play live!”

It was just a small child, no need to be slick,

So Kent thought up a lie, and he thought it up quick.

“Yes, well, I’m here to help Gainer. His tail is too light,”

“It gets stuck on the left and won’t wag to the right.”

“I’m taking him now to Mosaic, my dear.”

“I’ll fix him up there and I’ll bring him back here.”

“Well, I really love Gainer, but love you, Kent, the best!”

Then Kent felt a strange feeling inside of his chest,

A feeling he’d felt only two times before,

But the difference this time was he felt even more.

Kent let go of Gainer and straightened his tie,

“It can wait til tomorrow, for tonight he’ll get by.”

Then Gainer tapped Kent on the top of his head,

Kent signed the girl’s jersey and said, “Time for bed.”

Rider Pride’s not a thing you can pluck in the night,

It flows though Rider Nation and gives it its might,

And it flowed all through Riderville, into the streets,

Which were full of green melons and green holy sheets.

They flowed to Mosaic to cheer and to sing,

And to watch Double D get his first Grey Cup Ring.

That Jolly Green Crowd flowed down Albert with ease,

And Kent sat with Jon Cornish alone at Humpty’s.

They say that from space you could see a Green Glow,

And they say, Rider Pride, 3 more sizes did grow,

In the morning, the Riders ate Dario’s and Cakes,

The Cats? 83 boxes of stale Fantuz Flakes.